We know this is the time of hustle & bustle because that is what everyone is telling you right now! So we will keep this short! First of all keep in mind that we are human beings not human doings! Our solution is to write a love letter to each other and then discuss how we want to “be” as we approach certain events, travel or meetings. This is important because:
1) Everything you do is a choice you make, even moment by moment. Ed- When I woke up grouchy my mom would say go back to bed and wake up on the other side. I am not a morning person and Betty is. I have to choose to get up early with her and pretend that I am wide awake. Betty- We can choose our attitude and behaviors but I would rather sulk at times and wait for Ed to notice and want to know what is wrong.
2) Keep your eye on the reason for the season which is being a lover like Baby Jesus! Betty – If you are looking for problems, you will find them. If you are looking for solutions you will find them, too! Too often I act like a person with a toothache! The antidote is to focus on Eddie and what he needs. Instead of loving him the way I want to be loved, I need to think of creative ways to love him the way he wants to be loved! My love language is affirmation but his is physical touch. The challenge is to be unselfish like we recently shared.
Ed – When it comes to love gestures, Betty likes me being tender and gentle and I like to “crazy dance” when music “speaks to me”. She also wants and needs me to trust her judgement and my first thought is “how or why” instead of listening and allowing Betty to express her recommendation or opinion. She also wants me to listen especially when she expresses her thoughts and inner emotions. My first inclination is to react instead of respond.
So today we give you a short worksheet created by our wonderful mentors, Byron & Francine Pirola of Smart Loving, to focus on each other’s love gestures! This will be fun and fast and very informative!!!
We wish you continued love and peace and joy for the rest of Advent and a Merry Christmas.
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