There are days when you just don’t have that loving feeling!
Okay, what does it take to keep each other our first priority? As we shared last, since our Good News Cruise we have been flying high as we embraced the challenge of seeking joy in the good and bad times, rather than happiness which only happens in good times. We started with our usual today – writing love letters to each other, praying together as a couple and using the Hallow App to do Lectio Divina. We also have a commitment to do as many things together as possible like shopping or cleaning, but today both of us said putting each other first was too much work!
Maybe it’s a super bowl “hangover” or maybe we just finished a big project on Saturday, but we both felt like a malaise had settled over us and neither of us wanted to be bothered to care about what was going on with the other.
Ed – As I pondered the situation, I realized that I just wanted to veg! As I wrote my love letter to Betty, I expressed my feeling of disappointment in my lack of enthusiasm.
Betty – I felt insecure and unsure. I didn’t even want to ask what was going on with Ed and after reading his love letter I realized that he didn’t want to know what was going on with me! We both judged that it was comfortable to stay in the malaise!
Even though we have structured our life to keep each other first, there are times when it just doesn’t happen and almost seems like more of an obligation than a joy. There are times when Sunday Church seems like an obligation, too.
Feeling disappointed, insecure, deflated, weak or whatever else makes up malaise are all feelings. The good news is that love is not a feeling; it is a decision we can make to either act on our feelings and stay stuck and separate or decide to love – to make each other important no matter how we are feeling! We will let you know how it goes!